What good is achievement if you burnout?
I was stunned by the recent speech given by Mesquite Poteet High School Valedictorian Sherin George.
“For the past four years, while ya’ll were out experiencing the world, growing into your own person, making connections with others, I spent the majority of my time in my room, studying, alone, or just in my own world.” Dallas Morning News (DMN), Metro Section, 6/25/2017
Sherin’s father, Sunny, set a high bar early that she should follow him and her two brothers as Valedictorian of the high school class.
“Sunny George and his wife, Shibu, didn’t settle for their children simply trying their best. They only accepted them being the best.” DMN, 6/25/2017
What early price has Sherin George paid with her
- soul
- joy
- relationships
“We weren’t allowed Cartoon Network. The only things we were allowed to do when we weren’t at school had to do with learning. We grew up at a young age.” DMN, 6/25/2017
I don’t know about you, but this sounds like the Guantanamo Bay of child rearing.
Formula for Burnout
- No Cartoon Network
- No play days
- No free days
Think I’m overreacting? Here’s more from her Valedictorian speech.
“I’m one of the least qualified people to give you advice on how to live a happy, fulfilling life.” Dallas Morning News, 6/25/2017.
That’s down right depressing.
Sherin George just emptied her sadness right in front of the Poteet senior class along with their families and friends.
I’m not picking on this young teenager’s accomplishment.
Only one out of every 1,348 students in Texas claims Valedictorian status.
But, pursuing achievement at the high cost of burnout leads to misery.
Reorder Free Time Ahead of Focus Time
Dan Sullivan, founder of The Strategic Coach, argues that free days are more crucial than focus days.
His premise is that scheduled free time should come first over scheduled focus time because free time is really a precondition for success and not a product of success.
Free time or free days
- energize creativity
- infuse vision
- settle the soul
Free days are the fuel for rejuvenation which according to Miriam Webster means “to make young or youthful again.”
Why are Mark Zuckerberg (33) and Elon Musk (46) rocking and rolling with innovative ideas, products and services?
Because they are “yutes” first (My Cousin Vinny).
Play is the beginning of a fruitful life at home, school or business.
Sullivan believes an optimum formula for success is to literally schedule
- free days with no school or business activity at all
- buffer days with planning away from work
- focus days for all out execution
And notice the order!
Free days first!
No Play No Life
I noticed this post (edited) on LinkedIn the other day from Rebecca Thomas.
“Today is bittersweet.
Today is my last day with a company that I thought I could call home for a very, very long time. No, my position is not being eliminated, my company is not closing.
I made the difficult decision to move on from something that I loved.
Why?
Because it was killing me. Killing my work/life balance. Killing my time spent with my husband. Killing my passion for the industry that I’ve been successful in for well over a decade.
And it’s not the company’s fault; its mine.
For the last 15 years, I’ve never been able to turn myself off. I’ve prioritized my work over my home life. I’ve prioritized early mornings over late night discussions. I’ve prioritized long meetings over long hugs. I’ve prioritized deadlines over my own health. I’ve prioritized the short term goals over long term dreams.
And then it hit me. I’m working my life away. Literally.
My health has rapidly declined. I went through a divorce at age 26.
I worked so many hours that I forgot my ADT code at home.
I stayed at work so long that I missed my grandmothers birthday, and it was the last one she ever had.
I let my job rule every decision I made.
So I took back the ability to say ‘No’.”
Rebecca’s story hints at another formula for a satisfied and happy life which I’ll share in another post.
Do you have a story or thought to share?
Steve,
Thanks for reinforcing what we all know, that all people need to take time to re-juvenate and re-create themselves. I think there was a reason that the first miracle recorded in John was Jesus turning water into wine. For too many people life is Work Hard/Work Hard, when it is supposed to be Work Hard/Play Hard. I could say a lot more, but I have to go sailing.
Marc,
I agree that too many people are overwhelmed in the “work” mode. Maybe that’s the common inability to say “no” as shared by Rebecca Thomas in the LinkedIn post.
Thanks for sharing.
Steve
Excellent!
Day in day out….Dentistry for 35 yrs. Then last weekend carried 2 teenage grandkids to see Journey in concert and then went out to farm and shot 3 wild boars! Life recharge!
Mike,
That’s why you’ve been able to practice clinical Dentistry for 35 years! Stay with the concerts, the grandkids and the farm!
Steve
Steve,
Excellent points and well timed.
Thank you,
Steve
Steve,
Sounds like you’re ready for a free day!
Steve
I took a day off today and now I have permission!!
Elaine,
When in doubt, take the day off. Right?
Steve