I never expected grief to open the door to such magical visitations after I buried my parents.
I’m not superstitious. But, I believe the supernatural pokes into the everyday world in a wide variety of forms and places.
An unexpected visitor surprised me at my mother’s grave nine years ago.
But a very different visitor appeared to me days after my father died, the one whose image you see to the left on my parents’ gravestone.
I captured this moment on video.
Early morning, shortly after dad died, I settled onto our patio overlooking the lake.
Was this dad dropping by to say hello?
Was God sending a buck, dad’s favorite creature in the world, to comfort me?
I think so. It felt too timely to be mere coincidence.
I believe God used this deer to illustrate three keys for a magical life even during grief.
And when these keys are kept in balance, the future shines bright even while mourning.
1. Grief finds strength in valleys
Usually, the rack gets my attention when I see a buck.
But, this time, I watch his feet.
His steady gait reminds me of this verse.
“It is God who arms me with strength and keeps my way secure. He makes my feet like the feet of a deer; he causes me to stand on the heights.” Psalm 18:32ff
The “heights” are the magical places of love and victory in our lives.
But, it’s the well-formed hooves from traversing the valleys that take us to heights.
It’s not enough to picture the heights.
Picture the purpose of valleys, as they build the grief muscle that carries you to higher ground.
Use the strength carved in valleys to reach and savor the heights.
2. Hold relationships together
My dad’s last words to me were indicative of his character.
“You’ve got to hold it together.”
Hold family together. Hold friends together.
Not grudges.
People.
Love is not just the first step. It’s the first, central and last step.
“The question to ask at the end of life’s race is not so much ‘What have I accomplished?’ but ‘Whom have I loved, and how courageously?’” Geoff Gorsuch, “Journey to Adelphos”
3. Grief can open the door to faith
Never despair.
It’s a great time and age for authentic faith.
Antony Flew, the great atheist, dropped a bombshell in 2004.
His works set the agenda for modern atheism for 5 decades.
But then he announced he was wrong.
“What I think the DNA material has done is show that intelligence must have been involved in getting these extraordinarily diverse elements together.” Antony Flew
He concluded there is no gradual formulation of intelligence in . . .
- the laws of physics
- DNA
- language
- energy
It’s all there from the beginning.
Before he died, the philosopher said that if admirers are upset then . . .
“That’s too bad. My whole life has been guided by the principle of Plato’s Socrates: Follow the evidence wherever it leads.” Antony Flew
Maybe he would have saved a lifetime of unbelief by watching the animals.
“All creatures look to you to give them their food at the proper time. When you give it to them, they gather it up; when you open your hand, they are satisfied with good things. When you hide your face, they are terrified; when you take away their breath, they die and return to the dust. When you send your Spirit, they are created, and you renew the face of the ground.” Psalm 104:27-30
Picture the faith and strength built in valleys and let’s travel to new heights together.
How have valleys made your grief muscle strong?